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Oh snap… that’s a lot.

842 days ago I saved something to “look at later”…

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I didn’t expect that it would take me this long. to get back to you little link  But as interesting as the link may be… I’m FAR more interested in what day it was 842 days ago.

Let’s find out..
:Deneé Googles It:

WHOA!!!! GUYS!! IT was November 22nd 2012.

I did NOT expect that.
Huh. So I wonder what I did that day. BRB I’m going to my calendar to see what was going on then.

Yeah, nothing interesting happening.  :/ Let’s check Facebook for other clues… brb

OH right, it was Thanksgiving too. That happens from time to time and it’s my favorite holiday combo.  Good food AND family all AND birthday wishes.

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A pic taken from my Nexus 10 tablet that was given to me on my 2012 birthday!


 

What was the point of this? OH, yes. I really should revisit my “look at later” items more often.  If for no other reason than to take an unexpected bunny trail trip down memory lane. PLUS this makes a great tweet and Lord knows I need to learn the art of clever tweeting.

Curious if I clicked the link?

I did.  It was 404’d. :sigh: I’ll never know what I was the link titled “Test Wall” was all about.

Iron Sharpens Iron (intro to blog commitment)

Some people do want to read what you decide to write down.

Be just as cautions as a picture posted to public. Don’t over-share, Don’t under-share, Don’t reveal the under-where.

I just made up under-where. I feel that should have multiple definitions.

The “under where” of my life.  Random thoughts. GO!
“All things before this moment lead to this moment and if you think of life experience as a sort of foundation then my past could be considered my “under where”.  The “some-things” and “some-moments” that came before.  I think it’s funny that if this blog was read outloud by a bot that people would think I’m writing about underwear. ”

And that is what I wrote about just then.  I think what I pull from that random thought is simply this:

I have under-where and you may or may not like it.

moving on

I said “Yes” to start an accountability meeting.  My friend said she thought it should be called “Iron Sharpens Iron”

and I thought YES! That was the name of my group on FB in 2007!  How fun.  But to be involved in another commitment .. let’s set up ground rules.  See, I had been coming up with this “meeting plan” for businesses for months and thought I could test it out with this new accountability group.

So that’s how it started. We talked to a few ladies and we committed to THESE rules.

1. Commit for 1 year.
2. Commit to 1 thing to focus on.
3. Meeting will be 1 hour.
4. Meet only 1 time per month.

We’re going into our second year and I may sound bragadocious here but the first year was AMAZING.  Staying so focused on one thing to really breathe life into and see it through with friends.. that meant the world to me on many occassions.

In this second year, though, I wanted to stretch to something I normally PooPoo.  Getting my thoughts to something digitally physical.

SURE I take pictures and post those online for my fans, friends and fam. But what about my thoughts?

For the past 2 years I have been “leading” as a part of this “accidental ladies group” called the Ninja Sisters. (Go ahead, ask me about it!) Throughout these 2 years I have noticed that my words and perspective seem to be something others enjoy.  What do I do with that?

I’d love to speak to women, get events together, come up with ideas, get funding to make it easy, help encourage and uplift, help define the truths of our purposes and path and ultimately be a part of getting the true message out there that every person maters and every person can take massive leaps of faith to live out their design and they can do so with people who really care.

People who trade judgement for grace and labels for love.

I just want to meet people who like doing life and want to link arms, so to speak, and literally speak love to those around them.

It is not impossible… but if I’m afraid to share my simplest thoughts then what other fears will creep in to try and cripple a message so bold. so simple.

We are here to love each other, not judge each other.

Anyhow I’m going to start blogging once a week as part of my Iron Sharpens Iron commitment for 2015.  :Deep breath:  Oh, and I have no idea what is going to happen.

Why I have kept all my cards

I see the paper-trail of my life as clues to unlock memories.

Be so proud of yourself Deneé, you actually unpacked boxes of papers this weekend.  I’m not sure what’s gotten into you since the move into the house on Robins Nest, but girl you are on FIRE with organizing and expressing yourself with your stuff.

For so long you’ve held certain types of people aloft, beating yourself up that you weren’t more organized or that you didn’t know how to put a plan to action for all your dreams and visions for a home.   Now, quite naturally, those skills seem to be showing themselves.

Perhaps it was all of those years going to friends houses who are super organized… or maybe working for Tracee and Sara finally wore off on you.  WHO knows, but good for you.

So in all reality the room dedicated to all your creative stuff is in total chaos at the moment but 1. you’re not feeling guilty about it 2. you are forming a plan 3. you have a new piece of furniture that could really help you meet your storage goals and 4. you’ve finally stopped comparing yourself to an unrealistic expectation of what it all should be.

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Come ON, how amazing was it to throw away 2 trashbags of old paperwork from 2007 yesterday?  You opened mail that had been sealed for 7 years because you were living in total fear of your finances…now you’re free.  AND because you actually put all the office supplies in one room you went on and made folders and labels and FILED AWAY important paperwork.  Even better? You’re not freaking out that you have multiple files for the same topic from various years of attempting to be organized bc you know that when the time comes you’ll get to it.

Let’s fast forward to today when you cracked open boxes of paper keepsakes from 6 moves and began to read letters and cards that have been written to you since you were a kid.  For the first time in your life you’re not angry when you see that nothing is organized by date.  For the first time you’re taking your time and reading kind words, written by family and friends through the years that describe what kind of a person you were/are to them.  You actually absorbed some love from the past and connected it to your present.  You’re waking up on a whole new level.

Hey, be thankful that you followed your instinct to keep track of all this stuff through the years.  You discovered some amazing things in that pile of paper.  Some forgotten, some never seen, some you still can’t open. 

Anyway, be proud of yourself when you remember this time of your life.  You’re unpacking parts of your past that you’ve ignored for a long time.  You’re not hiding anything from yourself…

or those who may be reading.

Retreat to peace

Carve out space to find truth and peace

There is a place in Republic called “Little Portion Retreat Center” that is up-kept by sisters who follow the footsteps of Saint Francis of Assisi.  I came across this place when I was just out of massage therapy school. They were asking for massage therapist to come and work on several people who needed relief after all their hard work for The Kitchen.  I am so thankful for that day, not just to be able to bless others through the gift of touch, but because I haven’t forgotten the spot of land just a little outside of the city.

For about $25 a night you can stay in a well kept 3 story farm home with enough bedding for 13 people. There are two kitchens, two and half baths, a game/rec room and most importantly… a beautiful few acres of land that are perfect for a walk into nature.  You can tell that the women who keep this land love and respect the space.

Having the ability to take a quick drive and “retreat to peace”  has become a necessity for me these past two years.  My preferred destination remains Little Portion. I ask my friends to join me there a few times a year and together we walk the land and talk about life.  We sing and laugh, cook and create and experience a moment in life together. Close enough to our lives and far enough away to reconnect to purpose.

Simplicity, stillness and peace.  How do you take time for yourself?

Washington DC Trip

Washington DC 2014

My brother and I decided to take a trip to DC after finding flights for about $200 bucks!  We stayed with Bianca and spent 5 days visiting the sites and making great memories.  I took a lot of photos and posted many of them to Instagram, so be sure to scroll back and scan them.

There were SO many highlights to our visit.  We went to see our representatives in the House and Senate, as well as watch debates on the floor.  We went on a Segway tour, visited monuments, toured a 100 year old schooner and SO much more!

The length of the trip was perfect.  I was ready to get home and see Justin again, and my dogs too of course. Visiting such a huge city is exhilarating, especially when the people of the city makes decisions that change nations.

Avoiding Isolation

Living alone is attractive sometimes…

With no one around to prod and poke or stir up memories and emotion perhaps one can live free from pain.  The road to isolation starts with avoidance.  Each step taken as a counter measure to a possible moment that could cause discomfort.  Avoidance is riddled with assumptions about how something could be, it is fueled with fears. Calculative moves involving decisions based on survival and preserving self.  These instincts have value for certain. There are people to avoid. There are situations to avoid.

However, if your avoidance has become your standard of living it has likely guided you to isolation. Isolation is a whole different kind of danger.

In the Christian bubble there are many people who avoid situations to better protect themselves.  These boundaries are important for many reasons, and I wouldn’t want to get into a debate with each family about why they choose to have this or that rule.  Where I fear for my Christian family is when a rule or regulation is hedging them in isolation.  Their choices are not mine to make, so I observe and do what I hope they would do for me… reserve judgement and pray for clarification that only God can provide.

We are raised in different homes, attend different social groups, listen do different teaching influences and the differences between myself and someone else are insurmountable.  I won’t pretend to know “best” for someone else’s home and life… but I will speak about the dangers of isolation.

When your words cut people from the love of God, when rules lift you higher than another human… you are on a path of isolation.  Be careful that in an attempt to avoid sin you don’t cut yourself off from humanity. We are human after all.

 

Would you buy from a “real catalog”?

Most of you know I am an image hoarder…

I love the random photos that I find on the internet. I save them to share on the FB pages and groups that I am a part of.  Some are serious, some inspirational, some thought provoking and many are flat out hilarious.

Today I saw this image.  I’m not sure if this is areal catalog or an artist depicting a point.  Either way I find it beautiful and I genuinely hope that more mainstream magazines adopt reality rather than a fabricated version of beauty and social expectations.

Movies

Never one to love the movies…

but this year my friend Aaron Dicer asked me to join him on a few reviews.  Having been a “behind the scenes” help for him over the past two years, the idea of being in front of the camera was oddly appealing.  DO I have compelling things to say about a medium I rarely invest time in?

Apparently so, as I have been asked to ONCE AGAIN, join sir Dicer on a movie quest.  LIVE today at 1:30 on his YouTube channel. Subscribe and watch the conversation flow with Aaron Dicer and Captain Logan!

 

today we talk TOP movies of 2013

Here’s a sneak peek at my top 3.
For the most disappointing and most surprising you’ll have to tune in or watch the video.

Is it that hard?

 

 

You don’t like to be judged, so why do it to others?

If you can attempt to RELATE to the person you are judging.. you’ll likely discover that they are no different than you.  If you don’t discover that revelation than you may want to double check the part of you that believes you may 1. be better or 2. deserve better than another human being.

In the eyes of God… your sin is just as nasty as (your presumptions of) their sin.

There are warnings about judging other people, condemning them, and that what you give (or do not give) coming back to you.

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Yesterday

I spoke to a woman who has someone publicly campaigning for her failure.

Let’s put ourselves in her shoes for a moment.  Pretend your past is available for viewing and someone decides to publicly reference all the reasons that you should be disqualified from life. Essentially pretend that someone is taking your past, turning lessons into weapons and handing them to anyone who will listen.  Imagine that person demanding that anyone armed take aim at you and fire, then pass the weapon to the next person.

My reaction to putting myself in this situation is dread.  In all reality this type of thing COULD happen to me. I openly speak of my past, of my failures and my downfalls.  I personally hand “weapons” to the public and pray that each person understands that I speak plainly so that they know they’re not alone in their humanity.  I want to be real and honest about what I have experienced in my life because it is MY LIFE!  If you don’t like my life and my honesty, there are polite ways to move respectfully apart.

I have come face to face with the “Accuser” enough to know if you make peace with your past it softens the sting of the pointed finger.

We may judge each other without meaning to, but if you are ACTIVELY judging someone and condemning them to a life less worthy of yours… you’re on a slippery slope.  Am I judging a judger?  Hopefully not.

I’m feeling a sort of righteous anger about my friend though and then today’s verse is about judging so I made the image above and decided to blog.

In all reality just because you judge and condemn does not make you less of a person than anyone else.  It makes you more dangerous. . but it’s your life, your pace and your story.  In my experience, and in the readings I find, life is not meant to be lived in the complications and darkness of becoming an accuser.  It is meant to be lived in freedom and love, which is not an easy charge.